Marian Kerr - Contemplate Life Coaching - Write with You

I’ve just been reading a study about ways of increasing happiness.
Participants were asked to ‘commit random acts of kindness’ and then score their sense of wellbeing over a period of time. ‘Committing random acts of kindness’ has become a bit of a pop psychology phrase, but it has merit and is worth thinking about for a while.

Surprisingly, the meaning of kindness is rather vague. Most dictionaries I looked up told me that kindness was ‘the act of being kind’ or ‘doing something kind’ – not much of a definition really. I think kindness means doing something nice for someone, not because it is expected or because it will get you something, but just because you want to do good for that person.

The word ‘kind’ covers all sorts of warm feelings such as generosity, consideration and understanding. And wouldn’t we all like to be on the receiving end of that sort of behaviour? It would make us feel accepted and validated; but even more than that it would make us feel valued.

One of the things that the study found was that when people feel valued by us then they tend to treat us in the same way and we, in turn, feel happier. What a great unexpected spinoff that is. Being kind costs us nothing but time and effort, but its results are far-reaching and have a positive affect on both the giver and the receiver.

Another thing the study found was beneficial in increasing happiness is to be grateful and give thanks. Such simple things really, but it is the small things that build together to make our lives what they are. The blogger on http://ordinarygood.wordpress.com is working on the premise that it is the ordinary good things that make our lives extra-ordinary. I tend to agree.